Bespoke Verse

Sometimes in life, you may have the need for a wee ode to commemorate an event, to read at a celebration, or as in the example below, to nudge behaviour in the right direction without resorting to dire directives, which can be tricky with paying guests. Whatever your rhyming requirement, our resident poet, Mulbert, whose irreverent verse can be seen at, will divert his creative capital to your project for a modest fee.

So whether you are advertising a product or service, would like a bawdy tale immortalised in verse for a stag or hen do, or even if you just fancy having a poetic biography for posterity to hand around the family, Mulbert would be delighted to help. Email with your enquiry.

The Dress Code Ode

Dear Guest, to help enhance your stay
When dressing à la mode,
Feel free to use this as your guide
Our golf club’s Dress Code Ode.

At breakfast and throughout the day
‘Til nineteen hundred hours,
Resort wear, casual, denim too,
But bathrobes? Just for showers.
And running gear or gym attire
One probably should shun,
Unless of course you’re in the gym
Or going for a run.
Respectfully we thus submit
Our few sartorial views,
Which incidentally still apply
For clubhouse barbecues.

In the golf house jeans are fine
But not out on the course,
Neither on the fairways
On the greens, or in the gorse.

And in our private dining rooms
A custom we’ve applied,
Is jackets for the gentlemen
At every eventide.

In the Member’s Dining Room
It will come as no surprise,
That as well as donning jackets
Men are also wearing ties.
On Saturday’s some members
Wear their formal Highland togs,
Whilst others choose to wear black tie,
But never jeans or clogs.


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